(More On Energy Management Cont. 3)

More Details on the Emotional Dimension

Introduction

By taking control of your emotions can improve the quality of your energy irrespective of the situation; this involves becoming more aware of how you feel at different times of the day and the impact your emotions have on your effectiveness; you are most effective when you are feeling positive energy;

"...Without intermittent recovery, you're not psychologically capable of sustaining high positive emotions for long periods. Confronted with relentless demands an unexpected challenges, people tend to slip into negative emotions - the fight-or-flight mode- often multiple times in a day. You become irritable and impatient, or anxious and insecure. Such negative states of mind impacts people's energy and cause friction in relationships..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007

The fight-or-flight mode freezes people's thinking, ie unable to think clearly, logically and reflectively; need to understand and recognise what triggers these negative emotions so that better able to control them.

Some powerful rituals

        a) doing exercises like abdominal breathing can help, ie
"...exhaling slowly for five or six seconds induces relaxation and recovery, and turns off the fight-or-flight response..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007

        b) expressing appreciation to others, ie
"...make it a priority to recognise their accomplishments and also to talk with them about their lives and their aspirations, rather than just immediate work responsibilities..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007

This is beneficial to both together and the receiver; this can be done verbally or in writing; the more detailed and specific, the higher the impact; the timing of these is important.

Linked with this is with doing a random act of kindness, like helping somebody; it has been found that giving is better than receiving plus it has been found to be contagious when others witness an act of kindness. Some examples include offering to assist a friend or co-worker with the task, giving authentic compliments, offering a stranger a gift, etc

        c) view given events in a positive light ("...positive emotions have been shown to broaden thinking and build key psychological, social, and intellectual resources.....They can 'undo' negative emotions and be the building blocks of resilience......people who report more positive emotions live longer and healthier lives.....both smiling and laughter have been found to boost your mood..."
Gretchen M Spreitzer et al, 2011

Often, when in conflict people, cast themselves in the role of victim, ie blaming others or external circumstances for their problems; the way you interpret and report facts is important, ie
"...discover you have a choice about how have you view a given event to recognise how powerful story influences the emotions we feel..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007

To cultivate positive energy by encouraging the most hopeful and personally empowering stories possible in any given situation, without denying or minimising the facts. This can be done through one of 3 lens:

        a) reverse lens (put yourself in the shoes of the other person in the conflict, ie
"...What would the other person in this conflict say and in what ways might that be true..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007)

        b) long lens (ask the question
"...How will you most likely view this situation in six months?..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007)

        c) wide lens (ask the question
"...regardless of the outcome, how can you grow and learn from it..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007

NB
"...rejecting the role of the victim and instead viewing events through three hopeful lenses diffuses energy-draining negative emotions..."
Tony Schwartz et al, 2007